Genuine relationships require a great deal of time, energy,commitment and emotional investment.
For this reason I have always been utterly bemused by the sheer no of friends people claim to have these days, esp since the widespread usage of social media. Almost every person’s profile I have clicked on in the last few months has a had friend count of over 500 .
With an average school having between 400-500 students thats like being friends with every single person in school !
I mean even at weddings the maximum guests you have if you are Caucasian is 50-250, or if you are brown is between 200-400 and that includes the entire odd assortment of relatives and colleagues, friends of your parents, their extended families etc. So where exactly are these 500+ “friends” ? I’ve personally never seen anyone at one time hanging out with 500 close friends have you? I mean even in the cult favorite show “Friends” there were only 5.
Have we redefined friendship to include any person with a social media account to have free access to our personal life? Or has the numbers game taken over relationships as well in this day and age?
I personally find the idea of someone I barely know access to all my social media just plain odd and awkward. I’ll give you an example, recently I stumbled upon a middle school classmate after almost 10+ years through a common friend. Even though we were never more than polite acquaintances back in school immediately she requested to befriend me on social media. Since she had already whipped her phone out and was looking at me expectantly, it seemed rude not to comply. A couple of weeks later however since I didn’t hear a single peep from her, I ceremoniously unfriended her off all my social media accounts.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a mean, hateful person ( well not all the time ) and I love the idea of making new friends. But here’s what I don’t get: befriending someone on social media only to ignore them in real life? Picture this I went to the movies with a “friend” and the entire time we were there she was busy liking pics on Instagram and commenting on Facebook. The while point of going to the movies with friends is to laugh together and comment on the funny and interesting bits. I honestly was pissed off and left wondering why she had bothered to come at all.
Secondly why would you want divulge all your life details to someone you just met( let’s face facts people from what we are eating and drinking, to what we are wearing to who we are with and where we put in all on social media).
Finally why would you want to have someone who you have zero interest in past the intial friend request, have all of their crap show up on your newsfeed? I mean it’s frustrating enough to have to deal with insufferable people in real life, but to have them irritate you online as well? I’ve frankly got no tolerance for the selfie queens, attention seeking status posters, repeated game request senders …you get the idea.
Why not just unfollow them you ask? Well I’ve done that but that still lets them look at my stuff whenever they choose to and I’m not in the habit of putting up a zillion different privacy settings for everytime I post. Plus everytime I happen to look over my friends list and see a name that i haven’t had any sort of contact with in ages it makes me wonder what in earth are they still doing on my friends list?
I mean the last time I checked Facebook wasn’t a dupe for the yellow pages .
To be honest I feel much better after I spring cleaned my social media contact list. It may have dwindled my friend count but atleast the ones left are the ones that matter. How do you clean up your social media let me know here
Until next time loves xoxo