I love people who can unapologetically be who they are, people who never have to pretend. Well I guess I’m being too positive about it…everyone pretends sometimes however, I mean the type of person who can come into a room and light it up. The type of person who has the weirdest hobbieswhile also having the typical ones and never has to give an explanation of who he or she is. I once had a crush on a guy like this…I wondered what set him apart from all the rest…and now I know. People who are truly happy and enjoy every moment in life have this incredible energy around them that makes me and probably others want to smile all the time! No wonder I had a crush on him…because who doesn’t love being happy?
Still…true happiness has been this crazy journey of getting to know the real me. When people say they need to find themselves…we laugh…because how did we lose ourselves in the first place right? No…I cannot pinpoint the exact moment when the real me started becoming so small and hiding inside me until I couldn’t find her any longer. I’m not sure if it was when people questioned my weekends of ballet rehearsals versus partying…or my laziness and apathy toward doing what everyone my age seemed to be doing. When that happened, I obviously felt a little uncomfortable but brushed it aside and put on a brave face of “I do whatever I want”.
However, I started implementing small “adjustments” to myself, as I viewed them. I obviously believed these were for the best…to make my life easier…to fit in. I mean everyone seemed perfectly content having all of these things in common to talk about…so why not me? If I could go back in time I would punch myself…make my life easier?! It made it so much more complex! I now laugh at this… Being ourselves and happy about who we really are…makes us be in peace with us! And that makes our lives easier. We have to be able to coexist with our real selves; to love the silence when we are alone, the thoughts that flow out of our amazing minds and to be able to treat our hearts and souls with the same gentleness most of us treat others we love.