If you are anything like me, boys are a foreign language to you. Correction: high school boys. They don’t reply to your (very important) texts, they talk to you and your best friend at the same time, and they would spend every moment playing video games if they could. I’ve never had good luck (or any luck, for the most part) with boys my age. Along with the highest level of immaturity, teen boys have absolutely no idea what is going on when it comes to girls.

When I was attending high school, the boys were more difficult. I would walk by the same boy, at the same time, for weeks in a row, and at times the most interaction we would have is a smile and then a quick look at the suddenly interesting tiled floor. This form of a relationship has been dubbed a “thing”. Who knew a “thing” could be so intimate? Most of the time I left school feeling like there was something wrong with me. Why did no male want to have anything to do with me, yet guys were all over my 5’2” friends with sweatpants on two sizes too small? Part of the problem was my lack of confidence in myself, something my friends who were skilled in the boy area never struggled with. The girls who are willing to walk up to a guy and ask for his number are the girls with the picture perfect relationships. Shy girls might spend months waiting for a guy to approach and ask for their number, which is unlikely unless they’ve found the gutsiest guy in the world. Rejection is their enemy, and only leaves them feeling insecure and disappointed.

One of my more recent dates was at McDonalds, where I was offered a choice between a $2 hamburger and a $1 fry from the happy menu. Unfortunately, my happy meal fries were a heck of a lot happier than I was on that date. If you’re going to bring me to McDonalds, at least give me a more tasteful option like grilled chicken salad. I’m a huge fan of the Newman’s balsamic dressing. The least I could get was a text after he dropped me off, but I spent the next few days waiting on a meaningless message that never came. I went on that date with my expectations a little too high, and was left sorely disappointed.

Every date I have leaves me feeling insecure, hungry, and confused. Tinder is becoming a more considerable concept of dating, since you don’t have to see the person, communicate with them formally, deal with rejection, or be hungry, all while talking to a boy in your PJS from the comfort of your own bedroom! As long as they don’t try and get pictures of you topless via Snapchat, Tinder boys are the new way to save money and avoid awkwardness at all costs. The weird part is that people find online dating sites the only way to meet men. What happened to confidence being sexy? Instead of relying on Facebook pictures to determine your level of happiness, focus on guys who have a voice and a real live personality. A shy boy from your history class could be the funniest guy you’ve ever met, but you’ll never know if you don’t introduce yourself.

Teenage boys hate rejection. They hate the idea that their abs might not be as appealing as the abs on the boy in the Hollister ads. What they don’t get is that girls aren’t just looking for a picture perfect body, or a hookup. Some girls are looking for a guy they can talk to about school, family, and friends with, or call up at midnight wanting to have a midnight McDonalds run (for that grilled chicken salad!) I haven’t met many decent guys looking to do that yet, but I’ve still got hope.

A boy is never worth compromising your happiness for. The amount of time I’ve spent dwelling on why things didn’t work out or why a boy didn’t text me back is enough time for me to have made 10 chicken salads and talked to 3 new Tinder boys (possibly even the boy in your history class). I’m not saying to rely on meeting guys via the Internet (please be safe about that) I’m saying don’t take teen boys too seriously. I guarantee you they haven’t replied to your text because they are either too busy looking at their abs in the mirror (in that case, throw the boy out the window), they’re playing video games with their bros, or they’re just playing hard to get. Guys like a chase just as much as girls do— it’s all in good fun, as long as you aren’t sprinting.